Unwell
SS by Anne

Justin's POV

Sitting on the floor, throwing a rubber ball at the wall repeatedly. This is what I now call fun. Sometimes I even talk to myself to keep entertained. It's a lot better than those voices in my head. They can get pretty creepy.

I'm on a huge tour and this is what I do in my spare time. I'll go to the occasional party but it's not the same anymore. The random one night girls is just stupid now. Even these celebs who just get with me for publicity is pretty sad. But I went right along with it. What can I say....I wanted some ass and there was plenty to go around. And now look where it got me....alone with a bad rep.

All day
Staring at the ceiling making
Friends with shadows on my wall
All night
I'm hearing voices telling me
That I should get some sleep
Because tomorrow might be good
For something

Brit's never going to want me back now, I can't say I didn't do any of the things I did. There was always some kind of proof.

Ah Brit, we had some good times. Really good if I can recall. I can't even remember what went wrong at the moment. I've spent a lot of sleepless nights lately just thinking about us. We had so many memories. Good. Bad. Funny. Our relationship and hell....even our friendship was put through the ringer.

Hold on
I'm feeling like I'm headed for a
Breakdown
I don't know why

A soft knock. Wait. Only Brit used that kind of knock, Lonnie was never soft about anything. And even Johnny's knock seemed stern. The guys would knock with some stupid jingle. But Brit's....it was always like a small bird pecking on a window. But why would she be here? I figured she'd try her hardest to be in any other town the wherever I am.

Walking to the door I catch a glance of myself in the mirror. I look like shit. I don't think even she has seen me look this bad. Of course she's seen me worn out, happy, excited, relaxed, and even pretty sad. But never this depressed.

I look out the peep hole just to make sure it's her. I always feel psychic when it comes to her. It's like we know each others every move even before we do it. Of course that was then . This is now. I take a deep breath and open the door.

Stunning. I just see the top of her head since she's staring at her feet but she's still gorgeous. My heart actually skips a beat when she looks up at me through her long lashes. And there's that famous smile that slowly fades into concern.

Britney's POV

It feels like a staring contest, I'm afraid to talk. He looks so....different. What happened to him? It can't be the breakup, it's been over a year. Maybe he occasionally thinks about us like I do. No that's crazy talk, he has plenty of women. Why would he think of me?

"Hi Justin" I say cautiously. Not sure how to even address him. Shit I'm not even sure what I'm doing here.

"Hey, what's goin' on?" He sounds so tired and drawn out. Maybe this tour is too much for him. He hasn't had a break, it's been non-stop working since the guys took a break. I told him to just chill, even for a couple weeks. That wasn't a pleasant conversation.

"Not much." Both of our eyes wonder to look at anything but each other. What should I say? I can't ask to come in and talk, that would be rude. Mama raised me better than that. But his mama raised him to be a gentlemen and invite a lady in. "Ok well....I guess I'll see you around sometime...." I start to turn around but he lightly grabs my arm to stop me.

"Where are you going? You must've come for something." Those eyes, I always get lost looking in them.

"I don't want to intrude. I'll just call you later or.....something." Why am I so damn shy around him now?

"No it's fine, you wanna come in?"

"Sure." I'm unsure of where I am as I walk into his current living area. He never was tidy but this place looks like a tornado hit it. Not one trace of light. Curtains shut. It's like walking into a death zone. Something doesn't seem right.

Sitting down on the plush chair with my feet tucked under, I see him sit as far away as possible. The very end of the couch, and he almost curls himself into a ball. He looks like a scared little boy and this worries me. His eyes dart to me as I begin to move closer, trying to figure out what's wrong. He's literally shaking, what the hell?

"Justin, what's wrong?" I ask as I lightly try to touch his shoulder but he flinches away as if I tried to burn him with a simple touch. Surprised, I sit back and stare at him. He could tell that hurt me. He's never pulled away from me.

"Sorry." He said just above a whisper. Barely audible to me.

"There's something wrong, you can't hide it. At least from me."

"I'm not me anymore. I haven't been me for the past year. It's a stupid front. I tried to get past everything, drown myself in music and girls but it didn't work. This is who I am now. A depressed hermit. But of course the press can't get a hold of that or they'd have a field day. So everybody makes me go out and do things to make me come off as the hot solo bachelor. I finally told them to stop and just leave me alone. I just need to finish this fucking tour and disappear."

Shocked. That's the only word for my expression. He must've put on a pretty good front because he sure fooled me in the past year. But now....he's totally broken down. I'm still not sure if it's from us not being together, him working too hard, or both. I don't know how to respond. I don't think he could shock me anymore after that.

"I miss us." He looks up at me with tear filled eyes. They're like pools of water that's about to overflow at an second.

I was wrong, that topped everything.

I'm not crazy I'm just a little unwell
I know right now you can't tell
But stay awhile and maybe then you'll see
A different side of me
I'm not crazy I'm just a little impaired
I know right now you don't care
But soon enough you're gonna think of me
And how I used to be

Justin's POV

"Stay with me, just for the night." Did I just say that? I can never think straight when she's looking at me. I think I'm scaring her, she's had that same look on her face for the past 5 minutes.

"Ok." Well that was easy. "But I leave tomorrow and I wanted to buy this dressed at a store across the street. I shouldn't take too long. Maybe you can go out and get some air while I'm gone?"

"Yea maybe I should. I could use a cappuccino actually."

"3 sugars." she said to herself.

"What?" I couldn't quite here what she said, it was more of a mumble.

"Nothing, what time should I meet you back here, 5? We could order in some pizza from Mario's." She grinned.

"5 sounds good." Why is my face hurting. Reaching up to feel what could be wrong with my facial features, there's something different about my mouth. The corners are halfway up my cheeks. Smiling. I can't remember the last time I smiled. Well a real smile. This is true, not fake for fans and the media.

And she's gone. 4 hours til I see her beautiful face again. Walking into the hallway I yell for Lonnie. For once he has to jog to keep up with me. I hear him ask what's going on but I don't say a word. She's the only thing on my mind. I just have to figure out how to kill a few hours or I'll go crazy.

Starbucks in sight, 2 blocks down. I pick up my pace but I'm immediately drawn to "The Chocolate Factory" on my left. Brit always did love some chocolate covered strawberries. I know nothing's going to happen tonight but she'd still love some of those to nibble on after dinner.

"She'll be so happy." I whisper as walk in to make my purchase.

This is the part I hate about being a celebrity, everybody in the freaking world knows who you are and thinks they know what's going on in your life. So of course I can't go out anywhere without getting noticed. There is usually a bunch of girls that rush me for pictures and autographs but lately it seems I'm getting a bad rap on the streets. I was moody a few times when fans came up to me so they went back and told all of their friends. I wasn't the nice lovable Justin Timberlake every damn second of the day, sue me.

So now instead of being pretty much tackled to the ground by teeny girls, people stand to the side, stare, and gossip about the most recent thing they've heard about me. Grand, isn't it?

See me
Talking to myself in public
And dodging glances on the train
I know
I know they've all been talking 'bout me
I can hear them whisper
And it makes me think there must be something wrong
With me

Rushing to the door after hearing the all familiar knock, she sways in with two garment bags over her shoulders. She flops onto the couch, completely sprawled out. Out of instinct I start to massage her shoulders, she's always worn out after shopping. She's surprised by my hands at first but quickly starts to melt under my touch. Cocking an eye up to look at my face she gets an inquisitive look and slowly turns to face me. This doesn't stop my own hands from doing their job but now she has her own job.

"You look tired." she says as her hands find my stiff.....shoulders.

Shrugging off her comment, I close my eyes to try and feel all of the kinks in her neck. She shivers as I find one and work it with the pad of my thumb.

I'm not sure how we ended up in this position but our foreheads are together, her hands are on the sides of my face, and her legs are laying on top of mine. I'm not going to be "hidden" much longer if she gets any closer. Sweatpants only allow so much.

"Maybe we should watch a movie while we wait for the pizza?" She looks up.

"Sure, pick something out while I go order it. Cheese only, right?" I start to untangle our bodies.

"Yep."

She didn't care for anything in my collection so she just ordered "Catch me if you can" from the TV. Wouldn't have been my first choice, but whatever makes her laugh is fine with me. She settles into my side while my arm lies across her back.

Out of all the hours thinking
Somehow
I've lost my mind

Britney's POV

Stomach full of cheesy pizza, heart full of love, mind full of questions.

"Come lay down." He pats the empty side of the bed.

"I thought I was just going to sleep on the couch?" I ask pointing to the other room. He looks so good in blue checkered boxers. I can't refuse him.

"No, I asked you to stay the night with me . How could you be with me when you're in there?" And there's his devilish grin.

"Nice reasoning. Ok." I climb into my side but immediately search for his warmth. What has this boy been eating? There's no meat on his bones. Even muscle can't cover up for some areas. He needs a good month of southern home cooking, he'll be his old self in no time.

"Oh I forgot something." He jumps out of my arms and runs down the hall. Confused I start to get up to follow him but he's already walking back in with his arms behind his back.

"What do ya have there, Timberlake?" I always loved his surprises.

"Close your eyes." As I do he climbs back into bed and all of a sudden I feel cold chocolate on my lips. Taking a bite I feel the strawberry juice start to dribble down my chin, but he quickly wipes it away with his thumb.

Opening my eyes I look down at the bedspread, he use to kiss the juice off. Past tense.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing." I shake my head.

"What, were you expecting this?" He asks as he grabs my head and gives me a soft but powerful kiss. He then process to kiss the spot where the juice leaked, lightly flicking his tongue out to prevent any stickiness.

"Maybe." I whisper and then smile when I notice he is too.

"Lets get some sleep." He says with one final peck after we finally finished off the strawberries.

Laying like spoons, his arms around my waist, I'm asleep in no time.

Talking in my sleep
Pretty soon they'll come to get me
They'll be taking me away

3:35am

"Britney" Where did his arms go?

"Britney" he tosses.

"What?" I roll over but he's still asleep. I stare at him for a few more minutes and he says my name over and over.

"Justin" I nudge him to wake up but he's too deep in sleep to hear or feel me. Starting to get worried, I look around for something to help wake him up. Nothing. Instead I lean down and kiss him, not too much to startle him but just enough to get him awake. If that doesn't work....nothing will.

Unconsciously he pulls me deeper into the kiss. His eyes flutter open when he feels me straddling his waist and laying on top of him.

"Please don't leave me." He starts to softly cry.

"I'm not going anywhere this time J."